my boyfriend went to chipotle by himself for the first time cause i’m writing some essays and ordered my chicken bowl. this bitch has NO BEANS in it. WTF. i am so emotionally distraught. even black beans would’ve been fine although i prefer pinto, but NO BEANS! i am mexican dammit! i NEED my beans! it tastes different and it’s so flat and lifeless on my plate although that might just be my perception of life with no beans.
on top of that, he had asked for mild sauce thinking it was the medium sauce and they put pico de gallo in my bowl. I HATE TOMATOES. pico de gallo is like 90% tomato. BLEGH. he claims the lady scooped it all out but i periodically have found chunks of tomato while attempting to eat this sad, sad bowl. 
if you are what you eat, then i am a sad, bean-less, tomato sprinkled chicken bowl from Chipotle.
NO BEANS. i cant get over that fact.  

and calling my aunts and uncles on the phone and getting all sentimental and shit.
it’s hilarious.
they’re also using spanish swear words awkwardly any given chance 
‘te quiero un chingo’
‘ya mire en el puto feisbuk (facebook)’
‘puras pinches fregaderas’
‘estamos pisteando a la verga’
my boyfriend already knocked out on the couch, it’s adorable really. i think he was going to ask my dad for his blessing to marry me earlier, but got nervous cause i took my puppy out to potty while they were talking outside and interrupted them.
my brother’s ‘drunk’ voice is so annoying.  
i hope he passes out soon. 

And I can’t do anything about it. Such as, going over there and cuddle with him all night and whatnot. Firstly because my mom has ears like a cat and her room is on the way to the living room. Second, cause it was my mom’s suggestion that he sleeps over so I wouldn’t have to drive all the way to his house and back in the morning to drive them to work in dallas and denton. I don’t want to break that trust. Thirdly, I’m on my damn period. I haven’t gotten it since may and now it decides to pop up. Now?! Ugh. I can’t even sneak or there and have my way with him anyways. Scumbag period strikes again!

it’s nothing compared to tonight’s soreness. lovemaking with harry potter and the goblet of fire playing in the background. hnnnnnng! perf does not begin to explain how amazing it was.
*parental advisory*  
i have a sex life that i am not shy about sharing on tumblr. it’s my blog bitches, if it isn’t your cup of tea, i won’t take you unfollowing me too hard. but i like you guise so please put up with me. kay? 

the best ever. the thunder, the lightning that would erratically light up the room. the steady drumming of the rain outside. the perfect positioning, flaring hormones, the deep desperation, lust and, absolute love in his eyes. unnnfffffff.

no not really. it started in freshman year, we had biology and geography class together but i never truly noticed him. it wasn’t until second semester that we truly became friends. then sophomore year we became best friends. he would walk me to class, carry my books and hug me goodbye. i still didn’t notice him. we saw eachother everyday and we talked all the time.
then suddenly at the end of junior year he told me he was moving away. i was bummed but there was nothing i could really do about it. we still talked on the phone regularly and texted all the time. he would visit from time to time and always came to my house to see me. i never had a clue.
when my senior prom came around, i was bummed that i had no one to go with. i told him about it and he suggested we go together. prom with him was amazing. he didn’t restrict me from dancing with my other friends but wasn’t afraid of acting silly with me and doing the robot and other cheesy dance moves with me.
after prom we went back to the hotel room with our friends and laid on the pull-out sofabed together while watching “the sandlot”. as we laid there cuddling, i suddenly realized, this guy is amazing. he is such a gentleman, he is such a nerd, he is such a sweetheart. 
as the days went by, we hung out more and more. then one night, exactly a year ago on may 19th, he asked me how i felt about him. taken by surprise, i didn’t know what to say. he poured out his heart and confessed that he had been having a crush on me since freshman year. then he proceeded to ask me to be his girlfriend. me being OCD and whatnot told him to ask me tomorrow on the 20th because it was an even number. thinking he would ask me tomorrow afternoon or something, i got ready for bed. at precisely 12’oclock midnight, he texted me. “dulce, will you be my girlfriend?” of course, i accepted his courtship. from the time i said yes, my life has been nothing but a fairytale. he makes me absolutely happy everyday. we have no issues and no major disagreements, if we do have small arguements, he will be the bigger person and try to work it out. i am so blessed to have him in my life and in my heart. he is more than what i deserve and he makes me happier every day. i absolutely am in love with him. i don’t understand to this day how i did not notice the signs of him liking me, but i’m glad that he is mine and i am his. i love you chad copelin. happy 1 year anniversary. 

when you completely open up to your boyfriend about all your fears, insecurities and constant worries about commitment and relationships.

and you start crying to the point of an anxiety attack. to the point where your walls come down and you reveal things about your childhood that you’ve never told anybody else.

to the point of that ugly type of crying that claire danes did in romeo+juliet when romeo (leonardo dicaprio) was dead. yeah, it wasnt pretty. 

but it’s made me realize why i love him so much. because he won’t judge me. he’ll sit there and rub my back while i’m crying and just say “it’s okay babe, let it all out. it’s okay to cry.” and made me realize that it would be pretty stupid of me to let such an amazing person like this go. so i am committed to staying with him as long as he wants me around. if that entitles marriage then i am all for it.

i just wanted to share this with all my followers, even the ones that don’t give a crap about my personal life. my tumblr is very important to me and i want this to be on my blog for future references.

i absolutely love chad. and not that cheesy middle school type of love. this love is the kind where i would give up everything to be with him. i would do anything, be anything to make it work. but i know that being with him, i don’t have to give up anything. i don’t have to put any effort or change anything about myself to be perfect, in his eyes i already am perfect. if you read this whole thing, thank you for your time. :) 

How is it that we used to talk on a daily basis and now, not even a hi? Looking back at old conversations and laughing at our stupidity that only made sense to us. Then realizing that we probably won’t be able to talk that way again. All because I just had to tell you how much I care about you and fuck everything up.